Where’s Your Heart?

I admit it.  I’m biased.  Having been involved in numerous “women’s ministries” over the past 25+ years or so–outreaches, classes, small groups,  “How-To” training, mentoring, Bible studies, leadership courses, teas, retreats, prayer groups and the like–I find myself… well… TIRED of most of what passes for “women’s ministries” these days.  You know: conferences, seminars, parenting classes, group speak, baking cookies, teaching VBS and Sunday school, manning (or “woman-ing”) the church social or decorating commitee, choir, kitchen, recipe swap,  and… well.  You get the idea.    

Lest I be misunderstood, let me clarify that there’s nothing inherently “wrong” with the 10 Weeks to Better Mothering, or 12 Tips to Become a Godly Wife,  15 Lessons for Loving Your Man or the “Do This, Do That” approach to “women’s ministry.”  As in, “Do these 10 things, follow this formula, and voila!” Out pops a spiritually mature woman, wife and mom. 

Excuse me?

It’s just that I’ve seen these kinds of “ministries” bloom over the landscape of Christendom like California poppies after the first Spring rain.  Maybe you have, too.  Let me be clear that many of them are noble and laudable, and meet real needs—to a point.  But what bothers me with this oft-replayed “ministry mentality” is that it too often reduces Christian womanhood to little more than a “To Do List.”  Nothing wrong with To Do Lists, but c’mon on!  Don’t you want….More? 

I do.  And there are some things I definitely don’t want in “women’s ministries.” 

For starters, I don’t want to be exhausted or guilt-laden by “women’s ministries.”  (“Oops!  I’m falling down in Items 2 and 9, back to square one!”)  Nor do I want to be patronized or meet Death by Boredom or Redundancy.  In short, I wonder… Is a To Do List who or what God intended for Daughters of Eve?  Why are so many “women ministry” endeavors just like a trip to Home Depot – you know, the “How To” aisle? Hmmm.

I also wonder… Where are the “women’s ministry” groups discussing that which is academic, scholarly and stretching?  Where are the discussion groups focusing on themes of grace and mercy in the collected works of Dietrich Bonhoeffer, Fyodor Dostoevsky or Leo Tolstoy within the context of personal application?  (Plans to launch something like this invariably fall on deaf ears.  Hmmm.)  Who’s read Elisabeth Elliot’s masterful works, These Strange Ashes and A Path Through Suffering: Discovering the Relationship Between God’s Mercy and Our Pain?  Where are the dicussions on and the rubber-meets-the-road applications of Biblical conflict resolution?  (It’s sad and baffling how so many “Christian” women are unable or unwilling to utter two simple words to an offended party: “I’m sorry.”  The usual response is to just freeze them out.  Why?  What does that “ostrich approach” accomplish?  And who benefits?)  And here’s a choice rhubarb:  when’s the last time you heard why “the original purpose of woman according to Genesis– to be a helper”—is an incomplete, unfortunate rendering of a Hebrew text that is notoriously difficult to translate?  

HEvencense can’t and won’t provide all the answers.  (To be sure, I often have more questions than answers!)   HEvencense also won’t “provide” yet another rant about all the things you’re failing to do as a “Christian woman.”  I’ve read those sites, blogs and books.  I’m tired of those sites, blogs and books.  They’re stifling, sometimes insulting, and often soul-killing.  Anyone else feel that way? You see ladies, what I want to know is, where is your Heart, the prize of the One who made you? 

If you’re interested, stay tuned.  Better yet, RUN (don’t walk) to your nearest Christian bookstore and get a copy of Captivating: Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman’s Soul, by John and Stasi Eldredge. 

I’m a ravenous reader, “chowing down” an average of a book a week, sometimes more.  But Captivating is in a class by itself.  This remarkable book is  234 pages of wonder, enrichment, invitation, explanation, exploration, challenge, truth, and… sheer delight. Like a cool draught of water on a blistering August afternoon, Captivating has refreshed, confirmed and rounded-out my views and understanding of Christian femininity.  Talk about a welcome whiff of fresh air!  I read it cover-to-cover in two days.  (Captivating warning: Bring Kleenex.  I went through half a box before finishing this extraordinary, outstanding tome.)

Indeed, it’s inevitable that HEvencense will include several “songs” from the Captivating “score.”  This may be due to the fact that I’m still a work in progress, learning as I go.  Sorting things out and processing  while leaning on the Everlasting Arms.  If you’d like to join me, you’re always welcome.  In the meantime, find out more about John and Stasi Eldredge by visiting Ransomed Heart Ministries via my links/Blogroll.

There’s more (like you had to ask?).    Stay tuned.

  Laus Deo.